I Might Be Slightly Neurotic

Merriam Webster says:

neu·ro·sis

noun \nu̇-ˈrō-səs, nyu̇-\

medical : an emotional illness in which a person experiences strong feelings of fear or worry

Is that me? I think it might just be. Oh, great. Now I'm rhyming.

We're getting ready for a trip - a trip of a lifetime. Though maybe not to my ideal destination, it still has the potential to be an amazing time.

So what am I doing to prepare? Cleaning. Every single thing in my house. I need to go away with a closed door on a clean house. Then I will be able to sleep while I'm away. And I will be able to come home to a house that is not screaming at me about all the things that need to be done.

I'm also packing. And cleaning some more.  And making lists. More lists. Maybe even lists about lists.

Yesterday was kind of my breaking point in the mess I was creating for myself. Stress was overtaking me. I went for a run with some worship music and had an amazing time with my Lord.

And today? In my weakness, I went back to the stress. But as I was making soup for our supper, one song kept popping in my mind:

I am free. I am a child of the one true king, and I am so much more than lists or a clean house or baggage left by my past.

"Through you my heart screams 'I am free!'"

He has overcome the world and no lies can change that. I am free to enjoy this time with my family. I am free to tell the Enemy he has no claim over me.

I am not neurotic. I am free.

The Prowling Lion

We've had some dissension among the ranks lately. It started out small; so small it was hard to notice at first. But lately it's become full blown.

Tattling. Disobedience. Complaining. Selfishness. Anger. Hurt.

It's not pretty. I know it's the end of summer and getting back into a routine will help. We will all have something to think about other than ourselves. But there's more to it than that.

I read this article yesterday. It was timed well in that it reminded me of the roots of the weeds. I was trying to mow the weeds down with different tactics, but the roots themselves need to be removed. To her list, I would add prayer.

Through prayer, God has shown me the depths of what's happening. Strongholds. Pride. Fear. Mine and theirs.

This week our children have been having nightmares, too. Not only are they scared, but no one is getting any sleep.

Can you see the prowling lion in our home? I know I can. It took me a couple of weeks to see it, but the Lord was good enough to reveal it to me. I prayed over and for my little family this morning.

"Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct...." 1 Peter 1:13-16

I'm praying for strongholds to be broken. For light to win over the dark. For love and hope and redemption. I am waiting expectantly. For grace and glory.

We took turns telling each other things we like about the others. You can see their faces as they hear why they are loved.

The Story

Summer is such a great time to try new things, right? Without the pressures and time constraints of our school year, it's my time to work on some projects around the house, read a little more, and maybe try to change some of our habits. I have a smidge more brain space available in the summer.

This summer, Berean bookstore is sponsoring a summer reading program. You can read eight books at your level for a prize, but you can also read the Bible for 15 minutes every day for another prize. I've been wanting to work more Bible time into the kids' lives, so a little extra motivation got us started.

The kids know the stories from Sunday School, children's church, and Awana. They hear the stories from us often. But I don't want them to have a disjointed knowledge of Scripture. I want them to begin to see how it all fits together. A few years ago, I did a Kay Arthur study on Covenant, and it was AMAZING. (I'll save that for another post.) We're maybe not ready for that kind of depth, (the Jesus Storybook Bible is awesome for this, but we've done that a few times and I wanted actual Scripture this time) but we need something more than what we've been doing.

So, I picked up an NLT because I felt the translation was easier for them to understand. We started with Esther, my favorite story. I love stories where seemingly unrelated events come full circle (hence my love for A Tale of Two Cities), and Esther is the perfect example. It makes me giddy, quite frankly, to see how God worked in that story.

After Esther we kind of floated around. Colossians, 1 Peter, Matthew, etc. But I realized while we were all enjoying it, it was still disjointed.

While looking for Father's Day gifts, we came across The Story. It takes the NIV translation and weaves together different stories into 32 chapters that feel like a novel. Dad has taken over this reading time; they often do it during breakfast. 

 

I love seeing how excited the kids are to dig in every day. I want them to grow up with this as a regular part of their day and not to see it as some daunting undertaking or a burdensome task.

We finished our official reading plan this weekend, but the 40 days of reading has created a new habit in us. 

His loot from Berean.

She chose a set of best friend watches.

At this point in The Story, the kids are reading about Joshua battling his way into the Promised Land. Just as God is showing me many truths in Joshua.

Praise God!

Wonders

I woke up grumpy yesterday, and it didn't get any better. I had had a sleepover with the kids the night before. Two out of three kids talk in their sleep.

I should have had a caffeine fix. I should have prayed. I should have found some way to sleep for a few minutes instead of growling at everyone.

But I didn't.

By mid-afternoon, I was a full- fledged bear.

I picked up my paint brush and supplies and starting painting some doors. Someone before us had painted them with a flat finish. Sigh.

I turned on some praise music.

Slowly, slowly, my heart changed. I began to pray while I painted. I was grumbling to God about my trivial complaints. So many trivial complaints that were making my heart heavy. Focusing only on myself in a small moment of time. Losing all perspective.

As I worshiped, my heart began to lighten as I focused on Someone greater than myself.

And then a friend sent an email to get together to study the Word. We've been reading through Joshua together. I had messed up our scheduled time, and she responded with: Let's do it tonight!

Okay, Lord. I see what you're saying.

In Joshua 3, Joshua tells them that tomorrow the Lord will do wonders among them.

Wonders.

According to my massive Strong's, wonders was originally pala meaning: deal marvelously, make marvelous, bring extraordinary.

Who doesn't want some pala in their life?

And then, as we talked about the wonders God was doing, we also talked about reverence. Knowing WHO God is. And this song came to her.

Beautiful.

"Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth?" (Job 38:4)

"...who enclosed the sea with doors when, bursting forth, it went out from the womb; when I made a cloud its garment and thick darkness its swaddling band..." (Job 38:8-9)

"Who has cleft a channel for the flood, or a way for the thunderbolt, to bring rain on a land without people, on a desert without a man in it..." (Job 38: 25-26)

Wonders.

Be Strong and Courageous

Moses is dead. The Promised Land is in front of them. The time for mourning has passed, and the time for action has come.

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God comes to Joshua to call him into action. He begins by reminding Joshua of the promise – He carefully draws out a map for him of what will become the land of Israel. What they've all been waiting for so long. 

He promises that just as He has been with Moses, He will also be with Joshua. “I will never fail you or forsake you.”

And then comes the words God apparently knows Joshua really needs to hear. “Be strong and courageous.”

Be strong and courageous.

God tells him this three times. He really wants Joshua to get the point. It seems to me that God knew there were some difficult times ahead. Times that might make Joshua feel weak and insignificant. Maybe even wonder if God was really still with him. He was facing a huge task of leading God's people into the promise God had made them a long time before.

Be strong and courageous.

After Joshua reminds the tribe leaders of their responsibilities in what's to come, they come back at him with the same words. We'll help you just as we promised; only be strong and courageous.

And how is he to be strong and courageous? God has reminded him of His promise. He says, Look, Buddy, there it is. Everything I have told you and yours I would do, I am about to do it. Right now. I've been saying this would happen, and here it is. Remember.

He reminds Joshua of how all this time He has been with Moses. And just as He was with Moses, so He would also be with Joshua.

But, maybe most importantly, he urges Joshua to be careful to follow the law of Moses, the first covenant. He reminds Joshua not to turn from it at all, not to the right or to the left. He should meditate on it, day and night. And what happens if Joshua does this? He will be prosperous, wise, and successful. God has given him all he needs to know here. A promise, a reminder, and an assurance.

What does Joshua have to do? Be strong and courageous. Keep his eyes focused on the One who has made the promise, the one who will carry him through what's to come.

Hearing that admonition repeatedly makes me gulp. Sometimes I hear God whispering those very same words to me. Can I be strong and courageous in what God is calling me to do today? Can I keep my eyes focused on Him and what He is asking of me?

Maybe God's not calling us to lead thousands into battle. Not today, maybe. But He is still calling us to be strong and courageous. Maybe about starting a blog. Starting a family. Starting a new stage of life. Maybe about sharing the Word with a nonbelieving friend. Sharing truth with someone who needs to hear it today. Walking through a difficult situation, whether our own or with a loved one. God is calling each of us to something today. Can we be strong and courageous to hear that call and follow Him through it? We can. He will not fail us or forsake us.